Abby and We – Tales of the Worst Emotionally Damaged Dog

I or Tim should write a book. I mean Josh Grogan did it about his dog Marley didn’t he? If you never read Marley and Me, you should – or go see the movie that will be coming out Christmas day. It’s a funny, heart warming book about a family and their supposedly “worst dog” Marley. They should have tried out a Wire Fox terrier name Abby for size and then they’d see what truly a “worst/best/emotionally damaged for no good reason” dog is!

Don’t get me wrong, I love the little bitch. She has personality like you wouldn’t believe…but for some reason she seems either that she is entitled to be royalty or that we beat her in our sleep without us knowing it - she does some weird shit. She’s really a tough audience. I think perhaps she was either a Queen or Princess of some sort in another life. Her perpetual glare seems to say “We are not amused”. Or my favourite expression of hers I am pretty darn sure she says to us all the time “Fuck off human”.

Since she was a pup from 8 weeks of age, she’s just been so damn serious and looks like she feels entitled to it all! We thought it was us! We couldn’t get her to play for any long length of time. But when she did like something it was a sickness – an Obsession (in case you don’t know Terriers, then tend to have obsessive compulsive disorder of some sort). At one point in the first few weeks I came home and Tim was LIVID and said “That is it, we are taking her back. I am damaging her”. I kept trying to reassure him that it had to be her , she was defective – I had met other dogs and they were so “normal”. We discovered only 3 years later getting her puppy Guinness that indeed she was abnormal, and that Fox Terriers are generally very goofy, fun and cuddly. As Abby got “older” we discovered how smart she is – maybe that is part of the problem, we are just too stupid to be her owners.

I then discovered a few ways to keep her entertained for longer stretches of time: Dog Obedience (so she is generally well behaved), Agility, Flyball, and walks in the woods/hiking. And the LASER pointer which we don’t use anymore as she was just too obsessed over it.

At any rate, it is hard to sum up all the “worst” events this Terrier has done. I’ll try and list a few here – and keep in mind, I laugh at all this, cause what else can you do?
- she’s destroyed a whole front hall of baseboards;
- she’s peed on the bed multiple times (she has to sleep on the floor now);
- she’s peed on the couch and chair this past weekend – did I mention she’s 5 years old - floor for no apparent reason;
- we have to put the baby gate up at night for fear of stepping into a pile of “something smelly” in the morning.;
- She eats the stuffing in any toy we buy;
- She cries for food – oh wait now she barks at us for it, but before she had her litter of puppies she would rarely eat – From one extreme to the other it seems;
- She beats up, mounts, obsessively licks her boy Guinness – he is usually too scared to move, and also she Tim – to dominate it seems;
- When we go to leave in the morning, and tell her to go upstairs she acts like we’ve beaten the crap out of her.
- When you groom her, she looks and acts like you are killing her
- She used to bolt out of the house the first year and a half – sending us into frantic mode – that Laser pointer then became VERY useful.
- When I take her out for her last pee, she looks at me like I’m destroying her spirit;
- She GLARES – OH BOY does she glare…See pictures here for details;

I could go on about this truly cranky pants dog, but I won’t. Now don’t get me wrong, I would not trade her for anything. I love her to bits. And if we had not gotten her, then we would not have a stunted, not so bright but such a good loving puppy Guinness. But this is what we vow…..we shall never get another female Terrier again – unless the breeder knows for sure she’s dumb and happy like Guinness.

I’d take a dumb Marley dog (or another Guinness dog) any day – at least he was happy and goofy, not a crabby serious Terrier.

OH but Abby…you do make me smile!!!!!

ACK, alright I'll Bite....Team Edward

Finished the Twilight Series. Edward can bite me anytime.

Yup, it's official I have defected to team Edward. Perfect man (well some faults - a bit over protective) , hot, a vampire....powerful, and rich what else can you ask for?

Team Edward vs Team Jacob

Alright, so I have just finished New Moon – the second book in the Twilight series. (all the rage with young girls every where in case you didn't know). It was not the best written book by any stretch of the imagination; however Stephenie Meyers books about a girl in love with a Vampire, and Werewolf are addictive.

After the first book I was both pulled in by Edward, loved him, and then pissed off at him for being so weak and brooding –running away from Bella. And then I started to read New Moon and fel in love with Jacob – so didn’t mind so much Edward was gone. I was hoping Bella would feel the same eventually and decide that the werewolf might be better after all – since he was sort of human and sweet, in a large, paw ripping sort of way. But then I ended up pissed off at Bella for her treatment of him. As soon as Edward was in trouble she dropped Jacob like a hot potato….bad girl!

I guess I am a Team Jacob supporter although by the end of New Moon I was sucked (ha ha) back in by Edward and his Clan. But to my mind I must be the gal who prefers the nice boy to the angry, brooding, hot guy who seems all consuming. Also what makes me prefer Jacob at this point in the series, is the fact that Bella did more fun things with Jacob, was more herself with Jacob, and could reveal anything about herself with him, coupled with the fact that he is her best friend. When one looks for a mate doesn’t one want that person to be her Best Friend? I know I do. With Edward, she is always touching him, and just wanting to stare at him, but I get no sense they are best friends. It just seems like a clear case of intense infatuation to me. And we know what happens to infatuation. It fades.

Now I can’t believe that I am actually writing about this in this fashion, but the books are addictive!!! I have read both books within a few days (and both are over 500 pages each). They are an easy read being Teen books. Harry Potter is a far better written series. But I see why teens love the Twilight series. I sure wish they had these books when I was a teen. Instead I read Judy Blume (she was great actually), Sweet Valley High, and those other stupid romance books until I got into V.C. Andrews – V.C. and Meyers certainly are no Rohinton Mistry or Michael Ondaatje. But, there was always C.S. Lewis whose writing was far superior to some of the teen fair out there.

What Meyers does well in her books, however, is create that true feeling of what it is like to be swept away by young love as a young woman, and also the intense pain that can come after a break up – coupled with the uber cool paranormal twist. Now granted her breakup pain went on a little longer then in real life, but I recall feeling that searing pain after a breakup. It’s brutal. I just hope that young girls realize that you don’t need a guy to make your life whole, and that eventually pain from that love or infatuation fades, and you move on. Also I hope girls realize that they shouldn’t cut out their friends for their boyfriend. I know at first when a relationship starts, you want to spend all your time with that person. Hell I think when Tim and I first started going together that was certainly the case, and even in the first few years. We always had friends about however, and have continued to build a large mutual friend base – both together and separately. Eventually we settled into making sure we hung with friends either as a couple or individuals and made sure we keep time for ourselves in our own pursuits. The great thing is though – I have a best friend, who I really love spending time with most of the time. Even after 11 years, I enjoy the stuff we do together. I found my Jacob after all. I don’t need no stinkin’ vampire! I got a Tim! I think Bella would have been better off with a Tim ….so until I finish the series of books I am on the Jacob Team. Who knows, maybe I’ll change my mind but for now it’s ---.GO Team Jacob!



NOTE: now I haven't seen the movie Twilight yet either ...but that Rob Pattinson who plays Edward....YUMMY -- maybe I'll be on Team Edward yet!

PPS - gee started Eclispe....Edward...hmmmmm..I'm coming around. I might be a fence sitter.
HOWEVER he is no Gerard Butler.

"Made in China" Makes Me Feel Dirty

I hate Xmas.

Correction, I hate the Commercial Xmas – because I do love the family time/friend time Xmas. Why is it that parents or family have to lavish kids with useless crap that is covered in plastic packaging, padding the pockets of a communist human rights violating country, that the kids will pretty much forget about in a few days? Why do I sometimes get sucked into this vortex? I guess some habits can be hard to break and one can fall off the “wagon”, as I do live in the North American Mc-World. Tim and try to be responsible, and we don’t often buy excessive things for ourselves. We have stopped buying presents for each other at Xmas. It really doesn’t make a whole lot of sense since all the money comes from the same pot. And we really really try to buy gifts from a good place. We also don’t tend to shop at malls, or buy clothes that often (I did buy some stuff last weekend for myself at Ladyfest but they are all made from recycled stuff). I mean we do sometimes go outlet shopping in the States but are always very reserved in our spending.

So I went to Waldo-mart yesterday after my office Xmas party to finish up the Xmas shopping. I only had one more person to buy for. My sweet nephew Aiden. He’s only 5 ½ and what do you get a boy that age? Something Boyish – cars, things that blow up, Pokemon etc. But where do you have to buy such things? Walmart, Zellers etc. Now where are these items all made? Human Rights violating China. I know , I know – last year I was good and I went to Tiggy Winkles and got a European toy for the boy. I felt good. Less money in cheap toyland hands. And so far this year, Tim and I had been good with the gifts we bought the “kids” – saving Child soldiers in Africa for the older kids, and some crafts that are made from recycled items at Ladyfest, then for Marissa - a beautiful quilt made with loving hands, and an organic bamboo/soft Lamby filled bunny – again made with loving hands all from the Wakefield Craft show. The parent folks will also have very thoughtful gifts. Not a “Made in China” stamp to be found. Until yesterday.

My reasoning is this – Aiden is still too young to understand giving to the less fortunate, or saving a child in Africa, and he loves to play with stuff. So why deny that? That was what I was thinking as I entered the horrific place called Walmart. (god that place makes me feel sick). I discovered a few items I know he’ll like, and walked out. Then I got home.

Tim: “Look at all that packaging. And it’s all made in China. I’ll go to Tiggy Winkles tomorrow and get him something made in Europe”. And he went on and on…the usual rant that we both have about these big box mall stores that we sometimes enter, but never feel good about entering.

Me: “ya but, Aiden’s only 5 ½, he doesn’t care that it’s made in china! And it’s a NASCAR…Jimmie Johnson! You can control it…it’s COOL”.

Tim” ya but, look, the packaging…oh that stuff makes me feel sick to my stomach”.

Me: ”But Buddy, Aiden is too young to understand – we can’t buy him stuff like “You saved a child soldier”, from World Vision yet. What does a 5 year old play with - cars, pokemon…fun stuff. Wait until he is older to get him something that “saves the world” ”

And on and on the conversation went, while Tim was flanked on the couch by two tired cuddly terriers. I threw a blanket over his head.
Me: “Ack, live with it Dude. I ain’t taken the stuff back!”

I hate to be part of the problem, as we often talk about, but sometimes I‘m just to tired to think about what the alternatives are. It’s Xmas after all. I promised that next year, would be different. Maybe I’ll start looking in September because right now, I still feel kind of dirty.

Do children run this country or am I dreaming?

I live in a strange place......where children are allowed to run government.....

Well there is lots going on - both politically and theatrically. The hostage takings in Mumbai (read false flag oh ya for sure), the financial crisis, our own Canadian Government Circus– I actually am gleefully hoping they take the Neo Cons and get to form a coalition government. I think we need a shake up. I think we need to show that smarmy Harper he does not have a Majority to toy with. The one thing that pisses me off about this whole debacle is it could have been averted if 1) PEOPLE had gone out last Oct. 14th and actually VOTED. This year was the lowest voter turn out in decades, which is super sad. So we have no one to blame but ourselves…well I won’t blame myself because I actually got off me arse and voted.
2) If Harper wasn’t so blatantly ego maniacal and worked like he had a Majority which he does not! Hello Stephen, Love, you have a MINORITY. Last time I checked you have to actually WORK with the Opposition, not piss them and the rest of us off. He basically gave everyone the bird last Thursday and said “I dare ya”….well guess what Steve….they took your dare. Why do you play with us like that? Why don’t you just get to friggin’ work…ah too late now. I don’t think it’s in his DNA.

I don’t think the coalition will actually work but hey, can’t be worse then the non action going on with the Conservatives. I love the fact that all the Neo Cons call this coalition stuff “undemocratic”..uh duh really…so have you taken Canadian Poli Sci 101 lately boys? Last time I checked, this was all constitutional law. What an attempt to claw their way from defeat…desperate times call for desperate measures I suppose.

On the theatre front - Monday was the big day for the Stop the Cuts Rally. At 10am artists from all over showed up at City Hall wearing black and bringing artists props, dance shoes or what have you to show the City that Ottawa does not want these drastic cuts to the Arts. John Reid demonstrated wonderfully the importance to arts to a city. Did you know that Ottawa spends the most in the arts – that is people pay out of their own pockets more on average then other cities in Canada, yet its municipal government spends the least on Arts and Culture….what is wrong with that picture???? A lot! But the Councillors seem to want to reverse their decision…they seemed supporting the arts after all the information that they have received in the last months or so….so here is hoping.

Last Thursday night I went to see Coma Unplugged at the GCTC. I did enjoy it. Some parts I was not sure about but I did on the whole enjoy the experience and quirkiness of the play, the set design, and acting styles. Also, it was a joy to watch Jeff, my former Studio classmate. He was amazing to watch. I could see the training that we were taught come together like a fine wine. His alignment was PERFECT, connected voice and body, relaxed, and nothing contrived. And FUN FUN FUN. It looked effortless. He was a standout. Anyways, it makes me sad in a way that I didn’t finish the program although I think I took the base work with me. I mean after 3rd term would have been 4th – which is performing and just building on the basics to make it even more solid. But it also inspired me that I should use my tools and give ‘er!

Currently I am in rehearsal for Life After God with Vision Theatre. So far it’s a pretty light schedule and my sections seem to be going well. Although I have to hit the memorizing.. Ya, that might be an idea. Maybe tonight after the Tudors...ah TV how I have missed you all these long months away…….sigh.

Dear City of Ottawa - My Ottawa STILL Includes Culture!!!!!

I had my husband help write the following letter which i have sent to City Hall and various Representatives. This is ridiculous. Why do we still have to keep fighting this?
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Welcome to Dumbed Down City, population –you.

Once again actions have preceded thought. One wonders at this fallibility for this century of advancements points towards an apex of human understanding. A good hoodwinking it is. While city hall execs get the boot with hundreds of thousands of dollars in payouts, the arts get the shaft once again. I am ashamed that we still have to keep fighting about keeping Arts and Culture alive in this town when it has been proven time and time again, that we pump money into the Ottawa system.

As an Ottawa Tax Payer, who pays over $4000 per year in Property Taxes, and one who has paid to use City of Ottawa Facilities to rehearse as an artist and who is one who enjoys all arts, from paintings, to theatre, to music, I DO NOT support the 100% elimination of funding for festivals and the 42% reduction of funding for the arts and I want that money reinstated before the budget is passed.

While City Hall has rarely been charitable with its arts community, the source of funding has trickled. Mayor O’Brien is now preparing to park his Benz on the trickle lest it become a flow.

Let’s be clear, no arts community expects blank-cheque charity. Any artist knows that art is only true art when hard fired in the kiln of the hungry. And while I applaud a politician whose intent is clearly stated, I find nothing to applaud in a community that believes zero means zero without knowing the cost of zero. The cost is always that which we see least, the easiest cut to make.

Unfortunately the cut and the cost will be a struggling arts identity that will continue to struggle for less and less funding. While not forced out of it their theatres and dance halls, artists will have to charge more, and work in worsening conditions. Audiences will have less and less choice, perhaps giving up the search all together. And let’s be clear, business will also suffer as a result. Easier isn’t just the purview of government as audiences drive instead to see American artists on boxy-big screens.

If the cuts continue, when and if the enlighten Ottawa goes searching for a piece of art outside of the mainstream, the cost will be made prohibitive by semi-professional or amateur art groups eking out meager existences. The beauty of art is its birth in a crucible of supportive attendance—give and take.

Don’t get me wrong I believe in the Ottawa Senators. I believe, however, that there cow palace was planned with business concerns in mind and not a search for a city’s heart. Mayor O’Brien’s search again for a zero tax increase (har har) will continue with an attack on the only other thing that remains to define a city’s heart--it’s art.

Paris was not romantic Paris until the artists invaded Montmarte. And Ottawa will never be anything other than dumb Ottawa if the artists have to lay claim to distant acres to get some funding attention.

To be perfectly crystal clear:

1. any cuts to festivals, arts and heritage programs and organizations are unacceptable;
2. any proposed increases to funding already committed should be followed-through; and
3. that the City of Ottawa consider a budgeting mechanism so that this does not happen again.

I urge you to rethink this obsurd proposition. Saying NO to culture is saying no to your city.
My Ottawa Still Includes Culture!

Respectfully,

Chantale Plante
Public Servant , Tax Payer AND Artist

It’s Opening Night!!!!!!!

What is that song from the musicial The Producers...."it's opening night, it's opening NIGHT!!!!!"

Guess what, it's OPENING NIGHT! Our Tototoo evening of One Act plays opens TONIGHT. So finally Tim’s and my work is done. The show is now Linda’s, our Stage Manager, and we can just sit back and enjoy it with the audience.

Last night was a bit rough for all the actors in The Soldier Dreams - well for them rough is still GREAT - I was secretly hoping it would be. Is that wrong? The curse goes that if you have a smokin’ Dress rehearsal you have a lack lustre opening night. However, if you have the opposite then your opening will rock it! Hopefully that happens but only to the first one act, because Remembering Shanghai has really taken off and was great last night. It was just lovely to watch. At one point I stopped taking notes, held Tim’s arm as he held mine. I had tears in my eyes. The connection between Elyot and Victor was so beautiful to watch.

One thing I hate being a director though…is having the audience for the first time – and something happens that isn't what you directed – you feel helpless, want to yell at the stage….like last night we only had 5 audience members who were invited. Jesse, our young lad, finished his “Her Majesty” scene with Tish, with wine glass in hand, got confused as to what scene was next, proceeded to walk into the bedroom and move the chair and stand beside the bed with a wine glass…something he never does in the show. It took him a minute to clue in “gee why am I standing here with a wine glass in my hand?”…then he walked off. I wanted to calmly yell at the stage, “uh sweetie, you are suppose to exit Stage Right after your speech not Stage left”, but if this happened live I wouldn’t be able to do that. So Tim and I bit our tongues, then giggled to each other once he figured out he wasn’t suppose to be there. I might add Jesse is blonde..and oh so adorable.

I think I am getting better at this “letting go” business as a director though. Perhaps in maturity or experience. I recall directing my first one act play at Ottawa U for directing class. I was nervous as HELL as were my fellow classmates also with shows that night. We all went out before and got tispy to soften the nervous blow..then proceeded to hold each others hands. Tonight I can just hold Tim’s hand and he can hold mine with confidence, not nervousness. No matter what anyone says, we did a good job, we have two fantastic casts of actors who know what they are doing, and we can now sit back and enjoy the show with the audience for the rest of the week!

And tonight after the show is $5 MARTINI’s at THE BUZZ, the official Tototoo sponser! YAHOO!